A Forgotten Entry (from October, 2012)

So, this was written last year, while I was being housed in Southern California. I never sent it off, but I came across it recently and figured I'd sent it because it's still pretty relevant. Here goes...

Greetings to all: everyone out there across the globe, or just my mom, I'm not really sure at this point who's still reading this. I was thinking of my New Year's resolutions, and how my last eleven years have pretty much been the same. Now, understand the "apartment building" I currently reside in is a little....restrictive on...how to put this...altering one's state of mind so you can receive any message the cosmos deems you worthy of. Or you could just say getting baked off your ass and smoking cigarettes. So my resolutions have all been something accomplishable, like smoke more cigarettes and trees. Hey, what the fuck else is there to do in here?

This year I actually started making a list. Real resolutions that might not be fun and take some work...stuff I would have to follow through with and have to deal with people. And I really hate people. In my "apartment complex", people suck. The "managers" are assholes, the "tenants" are scumbag pieces of filth. This wasn't in the brochure.

So making a resolution where I had to interact MORE with people, and actually meaning to accomplish them, it surprised me to be making deeper commitments in the new year. It's probably because the world is ending in 2012. Or, it could just be the weed and I won't remember any of it in the morning. :)

Looking back, it was definitely the trees. I hate people and trying to help anyone has always led to heartache and stress.

Awesomeness is...a lost palm comb (written 11/26/12)

Today was a train wreck to be quite honest. It started out with me oversleeping*, which resulted in having to rush through my morning routine. Then I got a job I hate, only to find out I'm assigned to washing trays, which I asked not to be put on because the crew is lazy and I end up doing everyone else's job. 

 

Then I go back to try to get the job I want. The only hold up is I have to be a higher privilege group, which I meet due to the new rules that govern such things (a new CA law just went into effect). I only need a counselor to push it through, and with the C/O's that want me in said job, it shouldn't be a problem. But my counselor won't do it right now, for whatever reason. So no new job. That pretty much sucks ass. So I spent my morning spinning my wheels for nothing.

 

I go home to make lunch and find a mayo packet has exploded all over my lunch bag. Back outside to deliver a message to someone for a friend, only to have the person not know what he's talking about.

 

*Wheels....spinning...spinning....*

 

Back home, tired, beaten down mentally, only to find at some point I lost my new palm comb. Awesomeness. It's not that it costs a lot, because it didn't. But we can only get one every three months in a quarterly package, and I just got mine for this quarter two days ago. Absolutely awesome. And as of now, today is only 3/4th's the way done. So what fresh hell will be raining down upon me this evening? 

 

I guess that's the thrill of being alive, to see how the  universe is going to take a giant dump on you next...

 

Happy holidays, hope the Mayans are right...

 

* Inmates aren't allowed any sort of alarm clocks. When an inmate has a job that requires getting up and being ready early in the morning (like 4-5am for jobs in the kitchen to prepare breakfast), they have to basically wake themselves up on time. Adam's told me this makes him a nervous wreck and he keeps waking up during the night, afraid he's going to oversleep, which means he doesn't get much sleep and/or any restful sleep.